Previously on L.A. Black – Well, I left the bar and to be honest I don’t remember if I drove my car or if my friend and her boyfriend drove. Either way, I made it home and now I was in a panic. Now what, what are his expectations what are my expectations what the hell am I doing? Well since he was coming to my home very early in the morning I knew this was not just about a visit to chat, so with that in mind, I ran to my closet and put on my red lingerie and my black lingerie robe of the same silky material. I spent time looking in the mirror and checking on my hair, putting on more lipstick making sure my long nails looked all right and then the whole while thinking what if he never really shows up! Seriously the tension just grew, the anticipation grew, yes I was pretty much a mess.
Then there was a knock at the door…and I felt like a teenager again on a first date. Even though I didn’t look like one I felt just as inexperienced as one. I am there at the door, he is there but on the other side, smiling a very sexy smile, I’m trembling… I let him in the door, and honestly, I’m blushing all over from excitement, I’m still smiling and giggling but not for much longer. I thought what I was feeling was already more then I could bear, but when you looked at me, looked through me and pushed me up against the wall I knew then I would be yours forever. We kissed, and the passion just kept growing & I no longer felt giggly, no longer felt shy but the desire that grew inside me was one of pure lust, and passion. This man was breaking down my barriers, my self-doubt and fears, I was his, at least for this night, at least for this night, thank God. When this night of Sex was over, when he left giving me hugs and kisses and goodbye, was it over I asked myself, could he have only passed through my life and left this unforgettable impression on me, my body, my emotions just this once. Pleasant surprise it was not just this one night it was escapades of sex, fun, and laughter on and off for several years. You had late night hours at the printing shop and I would get a call from you to join you on your break, you would sneak me into the building and on top of the roof, where we explored each other until we both had gratification… more laughter followed as you tried sneaking me out of the building unseen… Often after you got off work late into the night, and early morning you came by & comforted me in my king size water bed which we both came to love & enjoy. We spent many amazing & enjoyable nights together… The sex was always terrific but the time you spent cuddling me, talking and sleeping with me made me realize I was bonding to you beyond any expectations I may have had, I tried not to have any… We went on drives in my metallic green rag top convertible Mustang…I think you enjoyed that car more then I did, which I didn’t think possible..you came to my workplace, I was so flattered & wanted to show you off to my coworkers…we went to Milwaukee to a Festival, you drove & you brought a friend and so did I actually I felt like they were both third Wheels we had more fun than they did. Then one day pretty early on in the relationship I got pregnant and after two and a half months I lost the baby our baby. The Dynamics of the relationship then started to change and I was so flattered when you invited me to your apartment for the very you first time since we had been going out & I didn’t know exactly what that meant and I kept feeling like there was something you wanted to tell me. I became very attached to you and very much in love with you which was not something I had planned at all… As time went on we saw less and less of each other in 1993 You told me you got engaged to somebody and this was after we had sex in my bed together so I just couldn’t understand why you were getting engaged and so I asked you straight out why are you getting married and you said you thought it was probably the right thing to do because of your age 25 and that you thought you should probably be having kids, & of course I never told you I had gotten pregnant with your child I didn’t really see the point. Well I think for a whole year after that I was sleeping around like crazy with young guys that had dark hair and dark eyes trying to find somebody that was like you that looked like you, but sorry it just never happened. Unlike yourself I started a relationship with somebody in 1994 & we dated for 2 years got married 96 and then divorced in 98 I used bad judgment going into that relationship…. after that I really got into my career started a new job and then out of the blue in 2000 you and I met up in a motel close to where I worked and spent an unbelievable night together. You are still married and you just had your first child so I still knew this was not going to go anywhere and I had just started dating someone and decided that’s probably the person I should be with. Once again I’m unconsciously trying to find somebody that was just like you or as close as I could find but it didn’t happen. I went to the other extreme and found a very loving man but not a very sexual man. I don’t know if I was I trying to punish, deprive myself or what… One day they reconnect after sixteen years, thanks to Social Media. That time, like so many over the many years,
I kept searching for his name… I just wanted to contact him. It happened, and boy did it happen.
This woman, me, was transported back in time, back to when they first met, when the extraordinary happened at least in my life which had become average, confusing & mundane. This Superlative feeling had me throwing caution to the wind. All those same feelings resurfaced almost too quickly, I could barely catch my breath. I went from living a life with comfortable predictability to experiencing emotions that became overwhelming in a short period. It began to feel nonsensical really, why was I reacting this way it’s because I remember what this feels like what Lance felt like. So with that said I let logic fly out the door and my feelings went into overdrive, like 120 miles an hour… Blushing, giggling, fidgeting around like I did when I met him. This was all happening from text messages, phones calls… I mean, come on! What if Lance was standing right in front of her again. I went from a quiet and reflective person to verging on total exhilaration. We have spent countless days and weeks on phones calls and text messages… but then a massive miscommunication more on my part as I think I kept reading between the lines which were a big mistake, but when we talked on the phone I could really hear what Lance was saying or trying to say, and in text messages not so much… Talking on the phone is what I really, really enjoy and even if it’s not every day I’d still rather hear your voice and what you had to say on the phone then in a text message. I think it just seems more real to me. Into a new second beginning ♡♡
Return tomorrow for part 4….